Sunday, February 19, 2012

Where's Mr. Knightley?

Overheard conversation:

"No, man, I don't know, you know? You never know how things are gonna turn out. Like, I don't know. I might like call her up and say, hey, you know, you wanna.....?"

At that point, the two cyclists had passed me and their voices were out of range. I could see that they were young and strong. They were dressed in serious cyclers' outfits, appropriately helmeted, their bicycles crafted for speed, precision. Everything they needed was in place for successful bike-riding.

I couldn't help but wonder what it would have been like if, when the young man was buying that bicycle, the salesperson had said when making his pitch, "Well, you know, I don't know. It's a pretty good bike. It might work out for you, but you never know, like, maybe..."

Of course, human beings aren't bicycles. Nor are they purchases. (At least they shouldn't be.) But this snippet of conversation hinted at a passivity, a laissez-faire if not fatalistic approach to relationships that seems to be the norm among young people, an attitude that would not for one moment be tolerated in other situations. My guess is that young man knows exactly how he wants his latte to taste and how fast his computer needs to be and keeps up with his cycling speed to the millisecond, but sadly little about what he wants from or could give in a relationship.

I'm glad to report that both of our married daughters were wooed by men who boldly and without timidity set out to win their affections. No, they couldn't have known "how it would turn out", but they made plain their intentions, were brave and confident enough in themselves to risk rejection for a chance at the hearts of women they deemed worthy of pursuit.

Thirty-one years ago a young Pat Bernardini made his intentions clear, making a young Terry Gresham feel like a prize. Who doesn't want that?